relationship & break ups

i was reading a friend's blog just a moment ago about her recent break up. it reminded me a lot about my break up over a year ago. lots of memories were brought back because when she was going through her previous break up, we were supporting each other emotionally. we both moved on in life and managed to place our feet on the ground again.

a little while later, she found a guy that i thought was perfect for her. they looked really good in photos and everything just seemed perfect. a year on, i found out he dumped her for another girl (i think?) and she sees the new couple together. reading that makes me feel like i wanna be beside her, holding her up so she can keep moving on. fortunately for me, i haven't seen my ex with his girl. i know how she looks like from photos, but if i had to see them together, i dont think i'll last 10 seconds..

well, maybe not now. coz i wouldnt give a toss anymore. but still, i'll avoid coming close to them if i can!

anyway, relationships....they can be the best thing that happens to a person, yet the result of a bad relationship can leave someone absolutely torn apart and in a complete wreck. i find break ups my absolute phobia right this moment, and anything close to a break up (including minor arguments) will leave me in tears because horrid memories come rushing through my mind and i will have this silly thought about breaking up.

as unhealthy as it is, there seems to be nothing i can do about it. i get really emotional over certain things and there's just no way for me to fix it unless i just move on and pretend nothing happened. or unless, the male counterpart comes and give me cuddles and shower me with love :D but having said that, the 'male' in me will just push him away sometimes.

..sigh. wish i could delete some of my past memories with a click to make space for happier memories!

--

speaking of the 'male' in me, apparently i am more male than my other half. my flat mate pointed out to me that she has better movie compatibility with my bf rather than me. then i cleverly said to her that "i'm quite male when it comes to movies" and she response was "yeah! that's exactly what i meant! i think stefan has better movies taste than you!"

and i just went -____- "are you trying to say i'm more male than stefan?!"

LOL!

apparently it's quite obvious, so says my flatmate.

HAHAHAHAHAHA! now that is very funny. i think my tomboy-ness is really showing these days :P